Originally the plan was to go to karaoke / line dance bar again, in fact the same one that I went to last week. Found out that plans had changed, and then we were just going to hang out at Jacki and Olivia's apartment, and Ben would join us. I'm not using last names in this post for a reason, cause it's not essential for you to know everything about everyone involved, but it's important to know why I'm sleep deprived right now. We talked about relationships and how they should work. We discussed this for three hours between the four of us, for another hour without Ben, and a little while longer just Olivia and I. There were a lot of points brought up from all four people involved. Seeing as we are all human and all have experience, we all wanted to express what experience we had received from whatever situations we have been in. We weren't looking to solve some great mystery, but to try fixing a broken man's soul.
Ben actually reminds me a lot of myself from not too long ago. Very pompous and selfish with a bad attitude about relationships and what each role should be, especially the role of a man in a relationship, and how boys and girls are supposed to work together and be sensitive to others' feelings and be able to help make it something special and worthwhile. His view on why things are the way the are and why they have to be that way, as well as how they should be seems so warped to me. I know there is the whole bro-code to follow, you know, you stick up for your fellow man in a situation of argument with the female species, but i think logic overrides gender. It's just how I feel about certain things.
I think we all react to things differently than anyone else, and it's not like there is a right way, or a certain reaction you are supposed to have to certain events. It all goes down to how you act, what your attitude is like after you have gone through something like a breakup, but then again it also starts with attitude in a relationship. Of the many things we talked about last night, one thing we talked about was being good with words or being a smooth talker. When guys use a line on a girl, there is a chance it will make a girl smile, which is something EVERYONE loves to do. It's human nature to want to be flattered, it feels good, and there's no shame in that. But flattery can only get someone so far. It's like having a house made out of water-dissolvent house. It'll hold for a minute, but as soon as the rain comes, you're screwed, completely. That's where lines will leave you. Now to how it goes being good with words...
While a girl will pay attention to what a guy says, that's not always the most important. Most guys underestimate the delivery on what they say to a girl, and how much that means to her. In a logical setting, where I have a chance to plan what I'm going to say, it's like I can't say anything wrong, I am clear and concise. I'm not smooth, but I can say the right thing, and go forward with that. When I'm a with a girl I'm attracted to, and much more someone I have interest in, my brain still processes everything the exact same way, the right thought process is going through my brain, but my heart gets away. My emotions will always work harder than my brain. But that's where the delivery comes into play. A girl should be able to look into your eyes and know how you treat the situation and how you treat her, how you feel about her. Anyone can have dreamy eyes, or hypnotic eyes. You can really tell a lot from someone's face, especially their eyes. When a girl looks into my eyes, I want her to look past the hazel and see truth. I want her to know there is truth in me and no matter how stupid things sound when they come out of my mouth, that she'll know that I am trying. Cause in the end, no one has all the solutions or all the right answers, and we expect misses or mister right to have that, than we might as well give up now. There is no perfect relationship, and something amazing is always worth working towards, and working to maintain it and improve it.
A relationship is not a goal, it's a journey.
Your welcome, lovers, cause the Only One says a lot of things.
My blog reading interest level is usually in the neighborhood of 1 day to 1 week, so don't expect too much from the man some call "Dave" (me).
ReplyDeleteTypically I limit myself to writing reviews on Amazon.com under my alias "Steve Zumdahl." Such as: http://tinyurl.com/ntp6b9
Anyway, my two cents is that I think the best thing in life you can find is a girl who treats you like a real person (not some sort of ideal or some sort of toy to be used), who you feel comfortable around, and who you have fun around. Other stuff kind of falls into place.
Um did you delete a post? I had a comment about that, but obviously you didn't want anyone else to read it, so... I'll save my two cents and invest it somewhere else.
ReplyDelete